Surgeries, tragedies, why I'm not at A-Kon 2018

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I've gotten a few inquiries from people about whether or not I'm at A-Kon right now because they couldn't find my table, and the unfortunate answer is no, I am not there. I had to withdraw. For the first time in 13 years. And it is killing me softly.

As I've said in my last two journal entries here, I'm far more active on tumblr now. If you follow me over there then you probably know about this stuff, but for those who don't, my personal life has been a hellscape since October 2017. At the beginning of October I blew out one of the discs in my lower back and had to suffer through six solid weeks of level 11+ pain before I was finally able to have surgery two days before Thanksgiving. The herniation was so severe and compressed one of my sacral nerves so badly that my surgeon said the nerve was actually black when he got in there to remove the herniation and relieve the pressure. I'm still dealing with slight numbness and muscle tightness in my right leg due to the nerve healing, and I had to wear a stabilizer on my right ankle for several months after the surgery because the numbness was causing me to roll my ankle slightly with every step I took, which made it balloon up like a baseball every night without a brace. 

I was recovering all through the Holidays and didn't really have any Holidays as a result.

In January I went on my family's annual WDW trip and we all caught the flu and were stuck in the room for five days, and we then spent the rest of the trip feeling crappy because we were getting over being sick. I felt cheated because I really needed that vacation.

At the end of February my oldest sister, Michelle, passed away from liver failure at only 51. Anybody who has been following me for a long time will remember that I lost my middle sister, Angeline, to breast cancer in January of 2010 at only 41. I am now the only child my parents have left. 

On the DAY that we buried Michelle's urn in the family plot at the cemetery, we found out my sweet little dog, Sushi, had late stage lymphoma with only a couple months left to live. She's only 9. Our last dog of the same breed lived to be 16. This isn't fair. 

So with all of this coupled with the fact that Sushi is at the end of her life now, I just didn't have it in me emotionally, mentally, or physically to do a huge convention and I had to withdraw from A-Kon. 

I fully intend to be back for A-Kon 2019, and hopefully in a better place mentally and emotionally if life will just leave me the fuck alone for five minutes.

:bulletblue: Follow me on tumblr to see life updates, picspam of Sushi, WIPs and other art stuffs. :bulletblue:

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